The Best Pop Songs

Pop songs ranked by how few beers they need. Pop is where the beer scale gets interesting, because the songs everyone can sing along to are not always the ones people rate well.

Top 25 of 74 songs with at least 10 ratings. Ranked by average beer score on a 0 to 11 scale.

1. 1
   

   Purple Rain

   Prince

   The last three minutes are the best guitar solo in pop. No debate.

   1.2beers30 ratings
2. 2
   

   Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)

   Eurythmics

   Annie Lennox staring directly through you for four minutes.

   1.7beers81 ratings
3. 3
   

   Tainted Love

   Soft Cell

   A Northern Soul cover that outgrew the original entirely.

   1.8beers35 ratings
4. 4
   

   Beat It

   Michael Jackson

   Eddie Van Halen did the solo for free. Best favour in music history.

   2.0beers39 ratings
5. 5
   

   Careless Whisper

   George Michael

   That sax riff is the most beer-proof sound in pop.

   2.4beers50 ratings
6. 6
   

   Like a Prayer

   Madonna

   A gospel choir, and the Vatican was furious. Perfect.

   2.4beers34 ratings
7. 7
   

   Blue Monday

   New Order

   Seven minutes that lost money on every copy sold. Worth it.

   2.4beers26 ratings
8. 8
   

   Waterfalls

   TLC

   A warning wrapped in the smoothest chorus of the nineties.

   2.4beers26 ratings
9. 9
   

   Time After Time

   Cyndi Lauper

   The rare eighties ballad that hasn't aged a day.

   2.5beers30 ratings
10. 10
    

    Pumped Up Kicks

    Foster The People

    The breeziest melody ever bolted to the darkest lyrics. Read them once.

    2.5beers39 ratings
11. 11
    

    Virtual Insanity

    Jamiroquai

    The moving floor did the heavy lifting. The song holds up anyway.

    2.5beers34 ratings
12. 12
    

    Black or White

    Michael Jackson

    Slash opens it, and the morphing video melted everyone's brain.

    2.5beers32 ratings
13. 13
    

    When Doves Cry

    Prince

    No bassline at all. Nobody noticed for years.

    2.5beers37 ratings
14. 14
    

    Hungry Like the Wolf

    Duran Duran

    The jungle video helped make MTV. The song earned the airtime.

    2.6beers32 ratings
15. 15
    

    Take On Me

    a-ha

    Best hit that falsetto after beer six. Not before.

    2.7beers38 ratings
16. 16
    

    Just Can't Get Enough

    Depeche Mode

    Weirdly cheerful for Depeche Mode. Enjoy it while it lasts.

    2.7beers37 ratings
17. 17
    

    Like a Virgin

    Madonna

    Tarantino wrote a whole scene about what it really means.

    2.7beers29 ratings
18. 18
    

    Billie Jean

    Michael Jackson

    Attempting the moonwalk after this is a beer-count-dependent decision.

    2.8beers41 ratings
19. 19
    

    Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go

    Wham!

    Jitterbug. That's the first word, and it only improves.

    2.9beers34 ratings
20. 20
    

    Groove Is in the Heart

    Deee-Lite

    The bassline is Bootsy Collins. Everything else is a bonus.

    3.2beers28 ratings
21. 21
    

    Girls Just Want to Have Fun

    Cyndi Lauper

    Still the correct thesis.

    3.3beers41 ratings
22. 22
    

    I Wanna Dance with Somebody

    Whitney Houston

    The most joyful four minutes in pop. Zero beers needed.

    3.4beers32 ratings
23. 23
    

    The Final Countdown

    Europe

    That synth intro has started more sporting events than any anthem.

    3.5beers36 ratings
24. 24
    

    Material Girl

    Madonna

    An eighties thesis statement, delivered entirely without irony.

    3.6beers38 ratings
25. 25
    

    Walk Like an Egyptian

    The Bangles

    The dance is not historically accurate. Nobody cares.

    3.6beers33 ratings